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Q: How can you tell if a drummer is knocking on your door?
A: He rushes.

Q: What do you call a drummer without a girlfriend?
A: Homeless.

Q: What's black and brown and looks good on a conductor?
A: A Doberman.

Q: Why are conductors' hearts coveted for transplants?
A: They've had so little use.

Q:  What does it mean when a drummer drools out of both sides of his mouth?
A:  The stage is level. 
                                                (thanks J. M.)